Blueprint Cleanse Green Juice Recipe (attempt)

Thanksgiving is OVER. OK, stomach? You have got to get a grip. I finally had to throw away the pie because you were out of control and greedy.

This is what you are getting today and you will like it:

Actually, if there is one “take away” from my Blueprint Cleanse was that juice doesn’t have to suck.

My previous philosophy was, juice whatever you have around and choke it down.

I never tried to make it taste GOOD.

So, I’ve been attempting to replicate the Blueprint Green Juice secret recipe.

I think it is pretty close. My greens are spinach, kale and swiss chard.

That was typically all I would juice, and it tasted like $h!t. Anyone who tells you kale juice straight up is yummy is lying.

Just like a shot of tequila, those bad boys need a chaser.

A couple apples, lemons, celery stalk and cucumber will do…

The recipe makes enough for two juices. I have been storing them in my used Kombucha bottles, so don’t let that confuse you. I just like the size and the ability to grab it and go. Some people like to store it in mason jars, but they can get a little messy in the car…

“Blueprint Cleanse” Green Juice Recipe (inspired by Blueprint Cleanse)

• 3 oz kale leaves (approx 4 medium leaves)
• 3 oz spinach leaves (approx two large handfuls)
• 3 oz swiss chard leaves (approx 3 large leaves)
• 2 apples
• 3 stalks of celery
• 1 really big cucumber
• 2 lemons

Juice them all, skim the “froth” off the top (who like a mouthful of green foam?) and store them in glass containers. The less exposure to oxygen the better, so the tapered top of the Kombucha bottles is a good choice since there is only a small area exposed.

This recipe makes enough for two 14 ounce servings.

Enjoy!

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Rehabbing

Dear God,

May this

Two beets and one green apple juice

Cleanse me of all my eating sins.

May is reverse the cupcake damage

and affliction from processed nacho cheese.

Please forgive me for thinking bad thoughts

of people driving slow in the fast lane,

for I was under the influence of sucrose.

Provide me with the strength to

survive the sugar shakes

during my Monday rehab.

Amen.

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Foto Friday

I’m cracking up at myself – totally forgot to post this yesterday. Major brain fart.

Good luck keeping it clean this weekend! We’ve just started getting back in the swing of things, so don’t give up now….

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Clean DAY 7

Today didn’t go exactly like the other days. It started off just fine, with a nice green smoothie, one of my own creation:

Dalai’s Green Smoothie

• 1 cup almond milk
• 5 medium strawberries
• 1/4 medium orange
• 2 medium lucinato Kale leaves
• pinch of stevia
• Ice

Then I was off to Hot Yoga. I felt really good in it today, as opposed to Thursday, when I felt like a weakling. When I came home, however, I was STARVING at 11:00. I didn’t have anything to make Junger Clean lunch, so I decided to make myself a veggie scramble:

Zucchini and Swiss Chard Veggie Scramble

• 2 organic eggs, beaten with salt and pepper
• 1 small zucchini, sliced
• 1 large swiss chard leaf, chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, pressed

I sauted the zucchini and swiss chard in olive oil and added the pressed garlic. I threw some spices on the veggies, and when they were soft, I added the eggs and tossed until cooked through. It isn’t pretty, but tastes great.

This eleven o’clock meal was good and gone by 2:00. At 3:00 I was ready to eat lick the scraps out of my dog’s bowl. So, I decided to make myself a proper lunch: 4 ounces of sushi grade yellow fin tuna over cabbage. I seared the tuna in a little olive oil and organic tamarin and sauted the cabbage in tamarin, cardamon and a little turmeric. Here is my second lunch:

I really wasn’t hungry at 7:00, but I knew I would regret not eating, so dinner was cold cucumber soup, a recipe from the Junger CLEAN book:

Cold Cucumber Soup

• 1 1/2 cucumbers, peeled and seeded
• 1 cup water
• 1/2 lemon (not just juice)
• 2 T pine nuts
• 2 T mint leaves
• 1/2 t sea salt

Blend until smooth.

I added a little hot sauce for a little zip. This soup had a great taste. Since it is customary to eat cucumber soup cold, it worked great. Eating his other soups room temperature that normally should be hot just doesn’t work for me.  Cold butternut squash – Yuck.

While I was at home sipping my cold soup, Dalai Dan took the kids for Mexican and ice cream. Cruel.  He knows my last meal would be chips and queso….

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Clean DAY 6 (and some basketball…)

I was looking through my photos to write this post and all my meals looked exactly the same. I flipping can’t recall one smoothie from the next. So, here’s how I think it shook out:

Breakfast was Junger’s Green Smoothie:

• 3/4 cup almond milk
• 1/4 cup coconut water
• 2 kale leaves
• 1/4 avocado
• 1/4 cup strawberries
• pinch of stevia
• ice

We had a crazy day with kids sports and in the middle of it I had to play a fundraiser basketball game.  I HAD NOT PLAYED BASKETBALL SINCE 8th GRADE.  And I sucked at it then.  These rare photos are the only evidence that the Dalai Lina ever wore knee high basketball socks.

Look at that vertical jump.

Number 23’s at it again with her wicked guarding.

That’s going to be all net, baby.

I was completely frightened I would make an ass of myself, or at the very least dislocate my knee (which I have done no less than 5 times).  And I sure as hell wasn’t going to let myself to pass out on the court do to lack of nutrients, so I allowed myself to have an apple and almond butter for a snack .  They were one of these apples…

When I got home I was starving and scarfed this down:

This is Junger’s spiced rubbed lamb chops that I LOVED.  I ate it with the last of my quinoa and some sauted zucchini.

Dinner was the rest of the mushroom and miso soup:

I’m still feeling good. The evening are still the hardest. Especially around 8 or 9 0’clock when my measly dinner has long been digested.

Oh, and that fundraiser basketball game? I threw two interceptions (can you throw an interception in basketball?), went for three shots that never even touched the rim, and had a left breast injury from my opponent’s elbow. All and all I would say it was a great success 🙂

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Clean DAY 5

Are you guys getting tired of this? I’m getting tired of eating like this, so I imagine you are. I’m not the kind of blogger that thinks my life is overly exciting and needs to post inane details of my existence…

But, I will continue to use the internet for my benefit and force you all to be my group support.

This smoothie really sucked. I had to choke it down. Too healthy.

Coconut Milk Tropical Smoothie (don’t let the title fool you – it tasted like crap)

• 1 cup coconut milk
• 1/3 cup Mango and Pineapple combined
• 2 Kale leaves
• 1/4 avocado
• 1 T chia seeds
• Ice
• Pinch stevia

Blend until smooth.

I think since I had not soaked my chia seeds before, they absorbed all of the liquid and it was too gelatinous.

Lunch, as you may recall, was eaten with Thomas at school for his Star of the Week. Since I didn’t have tome to cook anything, I picked up a chicken breast and steamed veggies. I added some of my tabouli quinoa. At this point, my taste buds have reassimilated and the sweetness of carrots never tasted to good….

This dinner smoothie tasted MUCH better. I know I need to juice more, but it has been hard for me to agree to a cup of beet juice for dinner over a smidge of sweetness from some berries.

Strawberry, Blueberry and Kale Smoothie

• 1 cup homemade almond milk (someday I’ll teach you)
• 1/4 cup blueberries
• 4 medium strawberries
• 2 kale leaves
• Pinch of stevia
• Ice

Blend until smooth. (Do I really need to keep reminding you this essential step? I feel like I am assuming you are dumb)

I was very proud of myself – I went to two little parties last night and managed to stay away from the wine and appetizers. I had a couple of asparagus stalks and 3 grape. Well done, if I do say so myself!

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Clean DAY 4

I decided that I would try to make myself a heartier smoothie for breakfast in hopes that it will stick with me longer. It wasn’t at nutritious as a big green monster smoothie with kale, but IT WAS SO YUMMY!  Even you non cleansers would have loved it.

Almond Oatmeal Banana Smoothie

• 1 cup almond milk
• 1 T almond butter
• 1 small frozen banana (don’t forget to freeze those overripe bananas!)
• 1 T pure maple syrup
• 1/2 cup gluten free oats

Blend until smooth

They really don’t want you to have bananas because of the sugar (then my rebel self added maple syrup), but the Dalai needed a little morning lift.

After breakfast I went to hot yoga.  I could tell my stamina was off.  I was struggling!  The only thing that kept me going was the thought of sweating all those toxins out.

After yoga I had to rush to a doctor appointment to get some unsightly spider veins injected.  See, this is why I detox, so I can inject myself with chemicals and feel ok about it.  Well, I wasn’t thinking and wore capri jeans.  I never had a chance to come back and change all day and had to sport these babies sticking out of my pants.  Dalai Dan was horrified when he came home and didn’t even say hello before he gasped, “Good God, what are you wearing?”

I was ready for lunch and decided to thaw some lamb chops.  Junger gives recipes for fish, chicken and lamb that you can eat only at lunch.  Since I have 1/2 lamb in my freezer from my friends farm, I thought it was time to use some.  The recipe allows for 2 lamb chops, which looked like a lot at first, but when you dig into them, there wasn’t much more than 4 ounces of meat.

The rub on this lamb was so incredibly good, I would totally use it again!

Lamb Chop Rub

• 1/4 t. ground cardamom
• 1/4 t. ground cumin
• 1/4 t. cinnamon
• 1/4 t. ground ginger
• pinch cayenne pepper
• 1 1/2 t. sea salt

Mix rub together.

Coat two chops with pressed garlic on each side (1 garlic clove a piece).  Cover both sides in the rub using 1/2 of the dry rub (save the rest for later!)

After sauteing them in a little olive oil 5 minutes a side, I used the same pan to saute a bunch of swiss chard.  A little tabouli quinoa, and lunch was served…

I was still hungry so I made myself a little bowl of sauted cabbage with cardamom and turmeric.  My nails are still yellow.

I had a huge thing of mushrooms that needed to be used, so I made mushroom miso soup (water, miso, mushrooms, salt, cook and then puree in blender)  I figured that way it was still a “liquid” meal, right?

A little vegetable juice to round out the meal, and I was STUFFED!  (just kidding)

How do I feel? Pretty damn good! I’m getting a little tired of preparing food. I may have to go out for lunch soon because the amount of dishes I’m creating is ridiculous…

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Clean DAY 3

I saw the light today. Sometime around 2:00 my dullness lifted and I felt a surge of energy. I think I’m almost out of the woods. It usually takes me about 3 days to get out of a cleanse fog. My body must finally give up the thought that it is going to be constantly fed and it starts thinking of other ways to keep up my energy supply. I think by now I have surpassed the carb/sugar cravings. We will see tomorrow…that will be telling.

So, this morning it was a Blueberry, Chia Seed Smoothie:

• 1 cup almond milk
• 1/2 cup blueberries
• 1 heaping T soaked chia seeds (did you know soaking brings out the beneficial enzymes?)
• 3 smallish lacinato kale leaves
• ice
• pinch of stevia

Blend until smooth

It’s hard to make blueberries and kale look appetizing, but this was a yummy smoothie…

For lunch, it was more fish! Today it was:

• 4 oz wild salmon, sauted with salt and pepper
• Sauted broccolini with garlic
• Tabouli quinoa (another awesome quinoa recipe)

The good thing is that I didn’t want to kill my children today. I only made Annabelle cry once when I told her I didn’t like tattlers. I also lied to them and told them I had hidden video cameras in their rooms and I could go play the tape if I wanted to see who really wrote of the wall…

Is lying bad?

Anyway, thank God I’m about to go to bed, because my liquid dinner is all used up. I’ll be dreaming of food tonight for sure.

Tropical Smoothie:

• 1 cup coconut milk (blend water and meat from young coconut. Will yield approx 2 cups)
• 1/3 cup pineapple and mango combined
• 2 inch piece of banana
• 1 mammoth swiss chard leaf
• 1 T soaked chia seeds (this adds lots of fiber, by the way)
• Ice
• pinch of stevia

Blend until smooth

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The Clean Detox

When I heard about Alejandro Junger’s detox book, Clean, I didn’t run out and buy it.  I have read a ton about detoxing, completed about 8 cleanses, and already understand and believe in the benefits.  As a matter of fact, one of the cleanses I did was a Junger cleanse I found on Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop blog about a year ago.  It was a short 5 day cleanse, and although I felt great after, I felt like the recipes were labor intensive (but yummy!).  I wasn’t sure I needed another book to convince me…

After hearing a little buzz about it amongst my friends, however, I couldn’t stand it. I had to read it.

And I am so glad I did.

I have gotten a lot of comments from readers and friends that go something like this:  “What’s up with the cleanses?  Sounds a little hoopy doopy to me.”

I try to explain that a detox is a time when you give your digestive system a break so that your body can fix itself.  If your body is constantly busy trying to digest food (and thoughts, for that matter) then it doesn’t have the time to repair damage and flush out toxins.

If you give your body simple, clean food in smaller quantities, the digestive system can be freed up to do some great work for you!

I won’t try to convince you or write a lengthy article on all the points, because Junger’s book does it all for me.  It is the most thorough, easy to understand, and compelling books I have read on detoxing.  It basically takes all of the articles and books I have read on cleansing and wraps it all up in one.

So, if you are curious about detoxing (and you should be if you have allergies, stomach problems, joint pain, bloating, constipation, diarrhea, lethargy, headaches, depression, or any other suspicious symptom you just can figure out the cause) GET THIS BOOK!  It will enlighten you the gut’s incredible importance:  if it is compromised by an unhealthy diet, disease starts showing up all over the body.   And often the symptoms don’t seem remotely related to digestion!

Ok, I’m off to start detoxing!  I’ll be doing Junger’s cleanse and posting periodically about it.  And if you have read any of my old cleansing posts, you know I’ll tell you all the gory details…

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